holding in a fart all day and finally getting home
i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter
This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.
so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh
HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS
STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)
STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt see you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”
STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen